Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Just Say No

One of the biggest things I must change in 2009 is my need to be a PEOPLE PLEASER.  When someone asks me to do something, I try my best to get it done, even at my own expense.  I HATE
to disappoint other people because I wouldn't want anyone to disappoint me.  But lately, I've found that I've been so busy trying to please others that I've neglected my own professional and personal responsibilities.  Bottom line...I have a hard time saying no.  For some reason, I feel guilty or bad if I can't fulfill an obligation or expectation set by someone else. So, my question is: Does anyone have a good suggestion on how they've said 'no' to someone without sounding rude. How did you let someone down easy?  I know there is an art to it.  I just haven't mastered it yet. Any and all suggestions are welcome!


Mrs. NearlyWed said...

I don't believe No has to always be a NO! I sooooo understand where you are coming from and I have learned the art of pointing "people in the right direction".
I find that many people want you to do things that they think are No brainers for you. But in actuality are things they can do themselves if they put forth a bit more effort. While it might be a no brainer for me to give someone information, or dig up an old presentation, phone number or contact, or make a call to set something up for someone, the truth is it takes time and removes focus from my own agenda and drops my productivity. In those cases, I point people in the right direction, before we even get off the phone I will say look here, here and here, call here, here and here try these people places or things and visit theses sites. That gives them a wealth of info they didn't have and a lot of avenues through which to reach their goal and takes me out of the loop. It's easier to say No to larger projects because very often it's just not feasible when you look at the investment of time and resources needed to complete the project. If you look at the resources involved it should make your answer of No a little easier.

Haralee said...

It does take practice especially up against people who ask why not after you say no!
A few suggestions:
I can't squeeze in another thing into my schedule, sorry.

I will have to pass on this opportunity, I am overbooked.

Sounds like it would interest others more than me, good luck.

I am up to my eyeballs over worked as it is, and can not take on anything else.

I have alligators at my ankles as it is and any down time I have I need to use to refresh my health.

I have made a commitment to my health to not take on more than I can fit in a normal work day, and this would put me over the top!